I have not deleted any of my social media accounts. Not Instagram, not Facebook, not even X (Twitter). But if you check my activity, you would think I had. I rarely log in. When I do, I scroll for a few minutes, feel nothing, and close the app. No likes, no comments, no stories, no updates. Just silence.
Turns out, I am not the only one. Most of my friends in their 30s are doing the exact same thing. They have not made dramatic announcements or posted farewell captions. They have simply stopped showing up. Their profiles are frozen in time, stuck in 2022 or 2023, like digital time capsules. No new photos of their kids, no birthday check ins, no vacation reels. Just quiet.
This is the real social media shift of 2025. It is not about mass deletions or digital detox challenges. It is about gentle disengagement. We are not quitting with a bang. We are fading out with a whisper.
The quiet exit is the new logout
You will not find headlines about this trend because it is happening off screen. There are no viral videos of people smashing their phones. Instead, there are empty comment sections, ghosted group chats, and feeds that no longer refresh with familiar names.
According to a 2025 update from Pew Research Center, 68 percent of adults aged 30 to 45 have significantly reduced their social media use over the past year. Many are not deleting their accounts but simply leaving them idle, like unused email addresses from 2007. Facebook usage among Singaporeans in this age group has dropped by more than 20 percent compared to 2023, not because people are leaving the platform, but because they are no longer engaging with it.
This makes sense. Deleting an account feels permanent, and in a world where social media is still tied to everything from food delivery logins to school parent groups, permanence is inconvenient. So instead, we do the next best thing: we stop feeding the machine.
Why the slow fade feels so good
There are three big reasons why this quiet exit is resonating with so many of us.
First, comparison fatigue has worn us down. Scrolling used to feel fun, even inspiring. Now it just feels like walking through a museum of other people’s curated lives while you are still in your slippers and yesterday’s T shirt. You see someone’s luxury condo, their overseas holiday, their perfect family portrait, and instead of feeling happy for them, you feel a dull ache in your chest. After a while, you realise that the only way to protect your peace is to stop looking.
Second, outrage is exhausting. In 2025, the news cycle moves faster than ever, and social media amplifies every controversy, hot take, and moral panic. But most of us in our 30s have mortgages, kids, aging parents, or demanding jobs. We simply do not have the emotional energy to stay angry all day about things we cannot change. So we step back. Not out of apathy, but out of self preservation.
Third, we are starting to value our time differently. At 25, wasting an hour scrolling felt harmless. At 35, that same hour could be time reading to your child, calling your mum, or finally fixing that leaky tap. We are beginning to see attention as a finite resource, and we no longer want to give it away for free to algorithms designed to keep us hooked.
What we are doing instead
Without the constant pull of notifications, something unexpected happens. Life gets quieter, yes, but also richer. We start noticing small joys again. The smell of pandan in a kueh, the sound of rain on a Sunday afternoon, the way your friend’s eyes light up when you actually listen instead of half scrolling.
Many of us are reconnecting offline. We meet for kopi at the void deck instead of liking each other’s posts. We join weekend hikes at MacRitchie or sign up for cooking classes in Katong. We text just to say hi, not to share a meme. These interactions do not generate likes, but they generate something far more valuable: real connection.
How to join the quiet exit (without drama)
You do not need to delete anything. Just change your relationship with your apps.
Start by noticing when you reach for your phone out of habit rather than purpose. Is it while waiting for your kopi? During your lunch break? Right before bed? Pick one of those moments and replace it with something else. Read a page of a book. Watch the clouds. Breathe.
Next, turn off non essential notifications. If your phone does not buzz, you are less likely to open the app.
Finally, give yourself permission to be invisible online. You do not owe anyone updates about your life. Your worth is not measured in posts or followers. It is measured in the quality of your days, and those rarely happen on a screen.
You are not missing out. You are opting in.
The joy of missing out is real. And in 2025, it is the ultimate luxury. By stepping back from the endless performance of online life, we are making space for the messy, beautiful, unphotographed reality of being human.
So if your social media accounts are gathering digital dust, do not feel guilty. You are part of a quiet movement of people choosing presence over performance. And that is something worth celebrating, even if no one online sees it.
Have you quietly stepped back from social media? Or are you thinking about it? Share your thoughts in the comments. I read every one.
Reference
Pew Research Center. (2025). Social Media Use Trends Among Adults Aged 30–45. https://www.pewresearch.org/internet/2025/03/15/social-media-use-trends-among-adults-aged-30-45/